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For the past few days, as my ear comes back to life, and the swelling subsides, I’ve had a very painful intermittent sensation in the little fold around the top of the ear: as far as I can gather this covers the vestigial ear muscle in humans, the one you use if you have the ability to wiggle your ears.

I can only describe the pain as that of a small Yorkshire terrier sinking its exceedingly sharp teeth into my ear – again and again and again. It subsides for a while, then I get bitten again. Last night, as I spoke to my mother on Skype, she was rather startled to hear me yelp in mid-sentence as the little pest struck once more.

Today it feels more like an enthusiastic chihuahua puppy chewing my ear off rather than an adult Yorkie – the teeth aren’t quite so sharp, and they don’t sink in quite so far, and he gets tired of it more easily, not quite as persistent as a stubborn little Yorkie. Perhaps the little chap has a fellow-feeling for me: chihuahuas have a molera, or soft spot in the skull, a “hole in the head”. As for me, I’m not doing too badly considering I had a hole drilled in my head just over a week ago . . .

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